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A man who had been blind all his life speaks about his experience. He is quite a character.

What a flipping awful day!

Who do they think they are?  Those trumped-up, idiotic … I’ll tell you, I may not have been able to see but in my time I’ve heard a few words… and most of them I could apply to those pharisees right now!

Phuh!…and I was s’posed to be the blind one!

Well, OK, so maybe it was the first day of the week when God created light and the seventh day of the week when Jesus opened my eyes to see it.  Who cares, I ask you? Thank God that I can see it now! Yes, thank God, I can see!

There I was (It’s yesterday morning I’m talking about), sat in my usual place, biding my time with my begging bowl, when it all happened.

A small crowd was approaching, and from the sounds of their footsteps and the murmur of their voices, I guessed that it was some religious lot.  Probably some rabbi and his crew … and I was right (well sort of!  It’s amazing how good you get at it after a while, and I, after all, have had a lifetime of practice!)

Well, they did the usual thing.  If I had been able to see them coming, I would have been off.  But I didn’t, so I was trapped. And par for the course, I became the object of their conversation again.  That’s me, to these religious ones: something to be talked about.  I present them, you see, with something of an intellectual problem.  They want to know why!

Oh God, it makes me so angry!  It’s so patronising, can’t they see that?  It really makes you feel used. And do you not think that there are times when I have agonised over the same questions?  Why ask the rabbi – why not ask me?  Whose to blame?  Why does it have to be that anyone is to blame?! I’ve heard enough scriptures to recognise Job’s Comforters again.  (It makes you think, doesn’t it, why they bothered to write it … if no one will read it and understand!)

Why don’t they just put their theories away? I am not an intellectual problem to be discussed.  I am a human being – to be loved … or at least to be shown respect!

That’s what Jesus did, you know.

“This has got nothing to do with his sin”, he said firmly, and with an obvious hint of rebuke.

“Thank God for that”, I thought, “at last someone is talking sense!”  After years and years of being put down – so that you almost start believing it yourself – oh you don’t know how good it is to have someone sticking up for you for a change!   I felt healthier already.

There was something different about this Jesus. I couldn’t see him, of course, but in my mind’s eye I could sense him looking straight at me.  Including me in, you know?  And the words that he then spoke about God’s power and might, they were not empty words, meant only to educate his followers, but living words that reached deep into my heart.  Words full of invitation and promise.

“While I am in the world, I am the light of the world”, he said.  I could believe that! Off I went, straight away, when he sent me to the pool of Siloam (well, it’s as good a place as any to wash away the mud from your face!) And when I came back, I could see!

He was gone, of course, by the time I got back. This was disappointing for me, I must admit ,  but it was infuriating for the crowd that soon gathered round.  They were so full of curiosity, you see. “Where is he?”, they demanded.

Well, how was I to know? What did they expect me to do – pick him out in an identity parade? Stupid people!  I’d never seen him before! Actually, I’d never seen him at all!!

A couple of the villagers have said that if they knew what was going to happen to me, they wouldn’t have taken me off to the synagogue.  But they were confused, you see.  They needed some advice, and who better than the learned pharisees?

The ‘learned’ pharisees?!  – Tch! It was they who dragged up all of this “Sabbath” business.  Typical!   Just like them!  Apparently, in healing me, Jesus had broken the law on at least three counts! (Now isn’t that just terrible!)

They launched a full-scale enquiry, can you believe it?!  And it was really something, I can tell you.  There’s none blinder, they say, than those who do not want to see.  That’s not true.  Jesus basically said it: “there is none blinder than those who think that they can already see.” That’s incurable.  It’s also, in my humble opinion, unforgivable.

So, off they went with their theorising again! And I suppose that it was one small mercy not to be the focus of their discussion again, although I did get a real grilling.

“You say this man healed you.  So, who do you say he is?”

That was some question!  Who was he? What did I really think? I wanted to say so much, but you’ve got to be careful with these religious bods around, especially in the mood they were in!   Quite clearly, He was not just any kind of man. With the powers he had got, he was at least a prophet – and that is what I said!

It was then that they called my parents in.

And a fine lot of help they were! You’d think that they would have been pleased about what had happened to me, but if they were they didn’t show it.  In they traipsed, heads down, without sparing me a glance until they were told to. They were scared, you see.  And so they abandoned me once again. Yes, I was their son – at least they admitted that! And then the truth that had long drawn a wedge between us; Yes, I was born blind.  I am their blind son! Their shameful and useless blind son!

They knew nothing more about me, of course. They have never wanted to know more about me! “He’s old enough … He can answer for himself!” 

Thanks Dad! Nice cop out, that one! Nice cop out again!

So, it was all up to me, as ever. I was called to the stand once more.

Now, in my life, I have learned a few wiles about looking after myself.  I’d have to, really.  So how was I going to play this one now?

Their first statement was the one that did it! I mean, how could they be so stupid … so vacuous… so dim? “We know that the man who cured you is a sinner”… Oh you do, do you? 

I figured then that my fate was sealed too. They had already decided.  They would see it no other way. Ridiculous! Still, I took it calmly;  a subtle distancing of myself from their argument, a simple and straightforward reminder of the facts … of what had undoubtedly happened to me: “I know I was blind, but now I see.”  What more was there to be said than that?

But they were unrelenting and determined. They neither asked or said anything new – just the same ground over and over again.  And I had had enough of it!

Or perhaps they really wanted to know?! A show of innocence: “I’ve told you everything.  Why do you want to hear it again?  Perhaps you too want to become his disciples?!”

That did it!  I mean, why did I have to go and open my big mouth?  But you should have seen how quickly they rose to the bait!  Oh, the curses!  And all their stuffed up knowledge, trying to put me down: “We know this!” and “We know that!”  Oh yeah?  “Then how come you can’t tell me where this man comes from … this man who DID cure me of my blindness?!”

And while I was at it, I thought I’d tell them a bit more of the obvious: “He had to have come from God, but why can’t …why won’t you admit it?”

It was not surprising that I got chucked out of the synagogue then!  OK, so maybe I had gone a bit OTT with the sarcasm and all – but that wasn’t really it, was it? They couldn’t face it, could they; the truth that was staring them in the face!  They didn’t want to see, And I ask, you, how can anyone not want to see?!

Of course, it didn’t end there.

I would have gone looking – but I didn’t want to get Jesus into trouble, or lead them straight to him.  What’s more, I needed time to calm down – and this new experience of looking and seeing, was not only marvellous, it was also exhausting.  So, I went back to my old place beside the road (Aa nice spot, and I had never known it!)   Because of all that had happened, I guess, people kept their distance and left me alone.  And I was glad.  I made myself comfortable and began to doze.

Suddenly the sounds around me were familiar.  A crowd was approaching.  Obviously from the sound of their footsteps and the murmur of their voices they were a religious lot … A rabbi and his crew …  Time to get up and go?  No! It was him again, I just knew it!

I waited until He came right up to me before opening my eyes. How I felt when I did, I’m afraid I just cannot put into words.

Oddly enough, Jesus wanted to question me too.  He’d heard what had happened to me, and now he wanted to know: “Do you believe in the Son of man?”

Like a fool, I asked him to tell me who this Son of man was, so that I could believe in Him.

He didn’t give me much of an answer, other than to tell me to use my eyes!